Hard Times

So this last Friday was Bailey's first day of Chemotherapy, we had a much longer day than anticipated because we also had to do a blood transfer. Bailey's red blood count was up to 80 which in a "normal" would mean they are close to death. But in Bailey's case she is still an active, happy, barking dog. So they do a process of taking out blood until the blood isn't as thick anymore and runs for smoothly, then replace it with IV fluids. So we did that first then the elspar treatment was next, I was most nervous about this and if Bailey might have a reaction or not. So did great, yea! So now we hoped and prayed we would see some drastic changes in Bailey in the next couple of days so we knew were are treating the right thing and can move forward. Well that wasn't the case, even though Bailey had been eating and drinking the days before her first treatment the day right after she stopped. We are on three days now of not eating or drinking much at all and Bailey has also had bouts of vomiting as well. So she did not respond well to her first treatment. This means we will not do elspar again and we need to figure out what the next plan is. Well today Bailey decided to add more stress on to me by vomiting with some blood. I again started to cry this is not what I want to deal with, I wanted her to just be better. I hate that this is all happening while I am pregnant and I am trying my best to take deep breathes and "try" not to stress to much. But it is very hard to do, there is so much up in the air for Bailey so much decisions we have to make for her. Because there was blood in her vomit today the Dr. thinks Bailey might have an ulcer so now we start two more medications, thankfully she is almost done with the other medication she had been on. She is more tired today and doesn't have a lot of energy. Dr. would like us to do another aspirate of her kidney and liver and see if we have more abnormal cells in the kidney and if we find any in the liver. It could come back negative like it had before, but because of today we don't want to try any other chemo that could possibly only make Bailey more sick. So like I said more decisions to make more medications, more of the unknown. I am getting so tired of this and just want one normal day with Bailey again. Will let you know what we decide to do next as we move forward into the next days and see how she does with this new medication.

Decisions Made

Mike and I have decided we are going to have Bailey treated for lymphoma cancer, the other tests just seemed to be tests to look for cancer. We feel if we are spending more money to look for cancer than we need to start treating cancer. So Bailey's first chemotherapy appointment will be Friday at 2pm, she will start with an injectable medication called L-asparaginase, or laspar. If Bailey responses well the this treatment and starts acting like normal Bailey again Dr's were correct and Bailey does have cancer and we will continue treatment. But if Bailey gets real sick from treatment, not fatal sick just sick we know we aren't treating cancer and something else is going on. Which will be more testing, so it's somewhat of a double negative but we feel good about finally starting something with her. We want our Bailey back and we hope and pray this might be the solution for her.

My love/hate relationship with food

I am so glad I can eat a full meal right now because soon enough I know I won't be able to anymore and it will be back to eating many small meals. But at the same time, it hurts to much to eat a full meal. Now when I eat a big meal my stomach feels like it rests in my chest, but it's not a heartburn feeling thankfully just a really annoying can not get comfortable in any position feeling. I will take on any and all of these uncomfortable feelings with a smile on my face because I am so blessed. But I can't help but wondering, if I am only 21 weeks what am I going to feel like in another month. I guess I should just say bring on the uncomfortably, I need to find a wonderful prenatal masseuse and I will proudly wear my tiger stripes when they come. :)Because I still couldn't be more excited to bring twins into our family.

Results

Well we got the newest results for Bailey today, and unfortunately it wasn't much news. She had her urine culture done to check for leptospirosis, a rare disease the many dogs get immunization for. It's rare but some dogs can still sometime catch it if they lick an area outside that has been peed on by a fox, squirrel or raccoon. But that result came back negative, so we also did a blood test for other bacterial infections such as e-coli and other rare but possible infections. But that result also came back negative leaving us at the place we were in before...the unknown. So we were given three options the Dr. would like to do a biopsy of Bailey's kidneys to give her a answer to if this is lymphoma cancer or not but it is expensive. Also because Bailey is having kidney issues a biopsy could be very harmful to her, she has to go under and could lose a lot of blood. She is already pretty week since she hasn't been eating and drinking much so that idea didn't sound wonderful to us. Second option is to do another aspirate but the Dr would extract from her liver this time instead of her kidneys. Again to see if they find the same abnormal cells they saw in the kidneys and try and confirm a cancer diagnoses. Thirdly we could treat lymphoma cancer without a full diagnosis of lymphoma cancer. But to us we feel there isn't anything else they could find, we have looked for everything and Dr's are just trying to find cancer. So it seems to them that cancer is the only option for Bailey being so sick. So now Mike and I decide what we want to do, the Dr can't really tell us what to do because she is at a loss as well. So will chat and decide on what we think is the best option for us and Bailey, we really just want her to get better and hope we can get her better sooner than later.

Little Doggy Steps

Bailey is taking baby steps I feel, hopefully toward the better but she hasn't eaten a regular meal for three days now. But she hasn't been shaking as much today which shaking usually means she is dehydrated, so it's nice to see her not shaking. We haven't done the IV since yesterday morning. But her drinking hasn't been as wonderful today so it's a strange place to be with her. I feel we continue to make a few steps forward then a step back. We should get our blood results and urine culture results back by tomorrow at the latest but I always wish we would hear sooner. I might do a skin IV tonight if Bailey doesn't drink much this evening. Hopefully we are getting better, I do know that the medication Bailey is on usually needs a full belly or it will make her tummy hurt. Because she hasn't been eating much I hope she just doesn't feel wonderful so she doesn't want to eat as much and once we are done with the meds she will get her appetite back. We will see tonight is the last night of the e-coli big pills that she absolutely hates so we are excited to take a break from those. Let's pray for some results and maybe some good news too? We will see.

21 Weeks

Because we had to cancel our appointment last week for a vet appointment for Bailey I had my Becker appointment today. Becker appointments are always simple and pretty uneventful, I was told I am gaining enough weight for two so that was nice to hear. I feel I don't eat as much as I thought I would eat with making two babies. But seems I am doing alright, I think I am going to start getting a protein shake supplement I don't crave protein as much as I should and I know the babies need it so I plan to put that on the "to get" list as well as a belly band. I mentioned my trouble sleeping and pain in my lower back to Becker and she said it would be a great idea to get one of those. The babies are doing great, growing and moving like crazy. I can't feel all the movement yet that Becker could see on the ultrasound but I feel more and more each day. The bummer news for the day was that both the babies are breech and I really want a vaginal delivery not a c-section. If baby A stays in breech position and is still that way at 32 weeks I will have to plan a c-section. So that is my new prayer that baby A will do a good flip and then stay that way. :) So good news for the day, we are very excited for our perinatal appointment next Friday the 18th. We were told we would be able to do the 4D ultrasound those are amazing! So hopefully we will have some good pictures to share.

Good Day

I am so very happy with Bailey today, she has been eating all day today and has also had some water. Not a lot of water but at least she is drinking some, she hasn't been drinking any for the last couple of days. I will still do the IV tonight since she still seems to be getting the shakes but I hope this means she might be turning a corner and getting better? I guess you never know but it makes me happy when she has a good day and I need happy days these days. :)